Zombies Archives ~ Lou 16

Zombies Can Celebrate Valentine’s Day Too!

How to Create a Special Valentine’s Day for Your Favorite Zombie

If the special zombie in your life forgets Valentine’s Day don’t be too hard on them. It’s the lack of blood flow to the brain that makes them forget these special occasions.

This doesn’t mean that you can’t celebrate, just don’t expect them to have made plans for you.

The first thing to think of is getting them a special Valentine’s Day card and there are some great ones to choose from which they are sure to be impressed with. You can find lots to choose from at Zombie Valentine’s Day Cards.

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Now what kind of gift would a zombie like? I would guess that brains would be their gift of choice, but if you’re also planning a special dinner then you probably want to get them something different.

I would suggest a new collar or muzzle if you keep them at home. They may not appreciate it, but if you keep them under control they are less likely to be destroyed by zombie hunters so it’s a very practical gift idea.

If they used to like perfume or cologne before they ‘turned’ then you could get them an air freshner to hang around their neck. It’s unlikely that they will appreciate it as much as you because they have lost their sense of smell – you, however have to put up with the stench of rotting flesh so you could think of this gift as being a little present for you too. Don’t feel too bad that these gifts are more for you than for them – it’s not easy loving a zombie and you don’t always get understanding from friends and family members either.

In fact I think you should buy yourself a Valentine’s Day gift from your zombie to you, just to celebrate that you’ve both ‘survived’ another February together. There are a few cool gift ideas that you might enjoy from zombie family stickers for your car to something sweet like chocolate brains. These can help you have a bit of a sense of humor with your relationship because I’m sure that your declarations of love didn’t include in undeadness as well as in life!

Did someone say brains?

You could be organized and buy one of the great range of candy brain molds to make your zombie Valentine their very own chocolate brains or you could go for a gummy bear styled brain….

Gummy Brain

No although I prefer the chocolate brains I know a lot of people like the taste of tropical gummy bears which is exactly what this gummy brain tastes like. The other thing about it is that it looks much more like an actual brain than a chocolate one does!

This is a great gift idea for your Valentine to chew on and if the advertising on the site is anything to go by zombies do love these gummy brains!

Zombie Love You So Much It Hurts

Isn’t this plush sweet? One thing that can be hard to get used to is the fact that you can’t snuggle up to your partner if they’re a zombie as it only gets them excited and they try and eat you yet again!

A plush toy is nice to give a hug to when you feel like you want a connection for a few seconds.

I would suggest you try and get your zombie half to dress up for a special meal, but I know how hard changing a baby can be let alone a grown ‘person’ who suddenly lurches forward in an attempt to eat you. A bite on Valentine’s Day is not something you want to get. There’s a big difference between a little love bite between ‘living’ humans and a bite from a zombie. If both of you become zombies then neither of you will be able to remember your relationship and there will be no more Valentine celebrations. It’s worst thatn having a partner with alzheimers because a zombie can’t even remember his/her youth.

Now dinner is something that you can make sure your zombie lover enjoys. First of all you need to get some sheep or cow brains ….. if too many people have got these already (there are others enjoying Valentine’s Day too) then you’ll have to go for another organ – hearts are a nice second choice that’s quite appropriate for this date too.

If you’re organized you would’ve gotten hold of some human blood which you can bring to room temperature and pour over the brains or heart just before serving up. This is the perfect meal for a zombie and if they have a little spark inside them that still realizes you’re there you can be sure they’ll adore your efforts to make February 14th very special for them.

Living Dead Zombie Dolls The Zombie Gift Shop Zombie Garden Gnomes

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How to Have a Zombie Christmas

Celebrate Christmas in Style with Both Zombie & Non-Zombie Members of Your Family!

Christmas is a time for family, but what happens if a member (or 2 or 3….) of your family is a zombie? Well personally I don’t think they should miss out on Christmas celebrations which is why I’ve decided to write out a plan for celebrating the holidays safely with both zombies and people who love zombies.

I’m going to show you ways to enjoy the season from decorating to eating a great Christmas dinner together so if you want a guide to celebrating Christmas with zombies this is it!

For the sake of this article I’m going to assume that at least one member of your family is a zombie which also assumes there are other zombies around which means you will need to take safety precautions because nothing ruins Christmas like an unexpected zombie bite – especially one that could have been avoided!

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Are Any of Your Family Members Zombies?

I’d love to know more about my audience so that I know what kind of tips will be more helpful for you to help plan your holiday season in a zombified world.

Christmas Music – Setting the Mood for your Zombie Holiday Season

There’s just something about Christmas music, don’t you think? Listening to classic tunes as you do your Christmas shopping or decorating your home just adds to the whole mood of the event.

The advantage of music too is that zombies find it very soothing, almost mesmerizing – until it stops and then you can be in trouble so if you like to join carolers during the holidays – don’t! The group of carol singers enthralls zombies who will follow them as they sing to their audience, but once they stop …… well zombies get hungry it’s not really their fault.

I think the safest bet is to just play some of your favorite tunes in the security of your own home with the windows boarded up and the doors locked.

Old favorites can be given a new twist for your special celebrations this year with lyrics such as –

Jingle Bells, Zombies smell,

Shoot them in the head

or a different version of the same song re-named Zombie Bells that starts with –

‘sloshing through the snow

of zombies that we’ve slayed

through the gobs of goo

laughing all the way’

Let’s not forget a song that my Gran used to enjoy singing, although she didn’t know this version!

Deck the halls with chunks of zombie,

Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Check out some of the music on the music videos below –

Deck the Halls in Zombie Stylin’

Christmas Decorating Ideas

Now you don’t want to be spending your holiday season fighting with zombies who don’t have anywhere to spend the holidays with do you? This means that even though it’s the season of goodwill you will need to remember your family’s safety and this means keeping the window’s boarded up.

Does this mean you can’t decorate? Absolutely not! There are lots of ways in which you can transform your home in true Christmas style, so let’s see how we can do it. For me the first thing that says the holidays is a Christmas tree and what better than a Zombie inspired Christmas tree this year?

Create a Zombie Inspired Christmas Tree
Are you a zombie lover or at least intrigued by these un-dead creatures that seem to be exploding in popularity these days? If you are then you might … Read more

Christmas Window Decorating Ideas

For the next part of decorating we look at the windows, now just because they’re boarded up doesn’t mean that you can’t give them some festive flair.

G P LTD DBX02-100018 Icicle Light Set

First you can hang lights around the windows, either icicle style lights like this along the top of the window or the traditional Christmas tree style lights around the whole boarded window.

Santa Artificial Snow Spray

If you’re usually singing, ‘let it snow, let it snow, let it snow’ in the lead up to the holidays then you can still have a little winter magic inside your home.

This fake snow isn’t just for glass, it can be used on your boarded up windows too. You can go free hand with some cool designs, use some Christmas stencils or just put a little bit of snow along the bottom of the window as though it’s just landed there!

Zombie Stockings

When it comes to the mantle, you can still hang stockings over it. Do make sure you have a fire going all throughout the holidays though, I would hate an errant zombie to find his way down the chimney instead of Santa.

Of course while we’re talking about the mantle, you do need to put all of your Christmas cards on there as well. Depending on how rampant zombies are towards these holidays you may find that you don’t receive many (if any) greeting cards.

I wouldn’t worry about what you do or don’t receive however as long as you make the effort yourself – after all they say it’s the giving not the receiving that counts.

I’ve found a great selection of Christmas cards for you to give to your friends and family. It’s likely that the postal service won’t actually be running so you’ll have to hand deliver them. Simply take your zombie family member on a lead to deliver the cards and that way any stray zombies will keep away. Now I would recommend that you put a muzzle on them as if they see too many other zombies they could get a little more animated than usual which means a little bitey and someone has to remain human in order to organize Christmas!

Zombie Christmas Cards
Have a very undead Christmas this year with some of these gorgeous Zombie inspired Christmas cards……read more

Dressing Up for the Holidays

Getting into the Christmas Spirit

Now I don’t know if you don a Christmas t-shirt or an ugly sweater at Christmas, but I’m sure you at least wear something festive.

I’m assuming that you’re keeping any zombie family members in the main living area so that they can enjoy all of the festivities and that they’re safely shackled up to avoid any unnecessary ‘accidental bitings’ which means you can add something to their outfits.

Some people would suggest a Santa hat, but I’d save them for the human members of the family as sudden lurching in an attempt to bite fellow family members can cause the hat to fall off or over their eye which can become disorientating and make them more aggressive.

A great idea is a Christmas necklace – you know the sort of plastic flashing jewelry that shop assistants (and possibly your aunt Edna) wear to put you in the mood to spend money.

Christmas Holiday Flashing Light Necklace

This is the type I mean, now pop a muzzle onto your zombie and then undo the necklace and wrap it around their collar for a very festive touch.

It’s like a holiday fashion accessory and a holiday decoration at the same time!

Delicious Food for a Zombie Christmas

Feeding Your Family Zombies During the Holidays

I don’t know about you, but one thing about Christmas is that it’s a time for eating too much and gorging on festive treats like mince pies, Christmas pudding, gingerbread men and more. What do zombies like to eat more than anything else? Brains of course!

Now you can’t exactly get a human brain at the supermarket or even at a butchers shop so how can you make their holidays extra special? The trick is organization and planning ahead so that they can have a delectable feast just like their human family members.

You should be able to buy a cow or pig’s brain for their main course, but to make it extra special you want to add some human blood which is where the planning comes into play. In the lead up to the holiday season blood banks generally make a concerted effort to get more supplies to stockpile. You need to either befriend someone who works in a blood bank or become a volunteer yourself.

Once you get access you’ll need to slip a bag or two of blood into your own bag to take home. Once you get the blood home it’s very important that you freeze it straight away. Once frozen zombies can’t smell the blood, if you have human blood lying around ‘fresh’ then it will drive any zombies that live with you absolutely crazy and extremely bitey around you!

When you’re preparing your big Christmas dinner simply let the blood thaw out and then serve up their cow or pig brain with human blood poured over it in the same way you’d pour gravy over your turkey (or holiday meat of choice). They will absolutely love it even though they don’t show their emotions you can be sure they’ll leave a very clean plate and somewhere deep inside they will appreciate what you’ve made for them.

What About Zombie Treats to Snack On?

Of course it’s not just about what to feed your zombified family member for Christmas lunch/dinner, it’s about all of the festive snacks we have on offer during the holidays. I mean seriously can you see them eating gingerbread men, candy canes or even sugar cookies shaped like Santa or a Christmas tree?

Actually, there is a way to make them some cool snacks as well and it involves getting some entrails and eyeballs from your butcher, here’s how you prepare a Zombie Christmas Treat –

Get any of the entrails or offal that you can from a butcher and put them all through a grinder together – you want to get it into a fine grind.

Pop any eyeballs you can get into your mixture (these are delicacies by themselves).

Now place the mixture onto some parchment paper, fold it over and proceed to roll it so that it makes a roll.

Twist the two ends of the parchment paper together so you get the look of a Christmas bonbon.

Next place the parchment paper covered ‘roll’ on to some tinfoil and wrap again, twisting the ends tightly.

Add the ‘roll’ into a pot of cold water and cook slowly over a low heat (it can simmer slightly, but you don’t want it to boil) for 40-50 minutes.

Remove from water and allow to cool before removing from the foil and parchment paper.

When it’s cold you can cut it into slices like it’s a piece of salami or liverwurst.

Wilton Holiday 6-Piece Mini Metal Cutter Set

Once you’ve cut this ‘roll’ into slices you just take one of these metal cutters and cut it into festive shapes for them to enjoy – perfect.

Now admittedly they’d probably prefer raw entrails, but I’m told they’ll still eat this and it sure looks more festive when they’re eating candy cane shaped ‘sausage’ than a bowl of raw entrails!

Zombie Inspired Christmas Treats for Human Consumption

Celebrate Your Love of Zombies with Festive Snacks

When it comes to the human family members you can still pay homage to your zombified family members by preparing delicious treats for your holiday season.

Simply make their favorite sugar cookie, shortcake or gingerbread recipe and use these cookie cutters to develop some fun treats that you can enjoy.

Already Been Chewed Cookie Cutter

If you’re after cutters with a real festive edge then you can’t go past these gingerbread men cutters who have obviously not run fast enough to beat any zombies!

Tucking into these treats should make it feel more like the traditional Christmases of old.

A Guide to Gift Giving at a Zombie Christmas

What Do Zombies Like?

To be honest as much as any zombie family member may have loved to receive the latest model of ipad, bottle of expensive cologne/perfume or a Fendi bag when they were still human about the only thing they want now is brains and that’s for their Christmas dinner!

It would feel strange to not give them a gift though so here’s a few ideas that you could place under the tree for them.

Car Freshener -Royal Pine

Car fresheners can be hung around their necks and help to disguise the stench of decaying flesh a little – it’s not exactly a wonderfully aromatic experience sharing a house with a zombie you know.

Dean and Tyler Leather Dog Collar

A new collar is a great idea as a lot of pressure is put on their collars as they pull against it in order to take a bite out of family members so it’s a good safety measure as well.

This is a nice looking one in brown that might suit who you’re buying for.

Zombie Inspired Gifts for Humans

For the human members of the family you can get a range of different things that they might enjoy, but there’s also a range of zombie inspired gifts that you might think are more appropriate this year.

There are lots of cool zombie gifts ideas available and because of the wide selection I’ve put them all on another page for you to enjoy –

The Zombie Shop

How to have a zombie Christmas — Feel free to pin me!

Will You Be Having a Zombie Christmas This Year?

The Zombie Gift Shop

Lots of Zombie Goodies to Buy!

Whether you’re looking for a zombie inspired gift or you just want to treat yourself I’m sure you’ll enjoy perusing our selection, although if you’re after actual human brains or body parts I’m afraid you won’t find them here………

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Zombie T-Shirts

I have yet to find a zombie fan who doesn’t like t-shirts which is why I’ve decided to start you off with a few cool ones right here and if none of them appeal to you then I do have a couple of links to more below.

Zombie Apocalypse Gamers Keep Calm Funny T-shirt I train to stay alive zombie running shirt You’re Goin Down with Zombies T-Shirt Zombies love you for your brains T-Shirt The WALKING DAD shirt Zombie Edition Fast (zombie) Food T-Shirt Vegan Zombie – Vegetarian zombie, Funny Zombie T-Shirt I’M WITH ZOMBIE BAIT T-Shirt Zombie Beatles T-Shirt

If you don’t fancy any of these then you might want to check out these pages –

Zombie Apocalypse T-Shirts
Shaun of the Dead T-Shirts

Zombie Books for the Inner Bibliophile Zombie

101 Ways to Kill a Zombie You Might Be A Zombie Fact book

Then again you might want to stick to books on The Walking Dead, my brother enjoys the graphic novel over the television series…..

The Walking Dead: Compendium One The Walking Dead: Compendium Two The Walking Dead Chronicles: The Official Companion Book

If you wanted an idea on some Zombie Apocalpse survival guides then you can check out a couple of books that are mentioned on our blog post – Help a Friend Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

More Cool Zombie Gift Ideas That Are Sure to Impress

There are just so many different ideas for zombie fans that it’s hard to know what to showcase and what not to, but here’s a few things that I think any zombie fan would love –

Zombie Garden Gnome Creepy cerebral candle Zombie Entrails Stuffed Scarf Plush Supernatural Zombie Tarot Cards Deck Walking Dead Playing Cards (2-Pack) Creepy Zombie Cribbage Game Zombie See Hear Speak No Evil Set of Shelf Sitters Beistle 00040 Zombie Feet Slippers Darryl Limited Edition (The Walking Dead )Funko Pop Figure

Living Dead Zombie Dolls

Zombie Dolls Not For Little Girls!

I first came across the Living Dead dolls a couple of years ago in a very eclectic shop and I absolutely loved how gruesome they looked, but between you and I there is no way I’d be able to sleep if I had them in my house! I would have nightmares of them coming alive while I was sleeping and stabbing me to death so I can safely say unless you’re buying for Wednesday Adams I would not recommend these for young girls.

Having said that if your teenager is into all things Gothic they may like these dolls. The thing with the Living Dead Dolls is that once they’ve got under your skin people tend to collect a lot of them. I have just discovered that they have quite a few zombie dolls as part of their range too and so I thought I would showcase some of them here.

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Living Dead Zombie Dolls Series 22

Undead Dolls That Will Give You a Fright!

If you’re staying somewhere and you turn the corner and see one of these five dolls looking at you from a shelf I’m sure you’d have a heart attack!

The five dolls who are each featured in the introduction are Goria, Menard, Roxie, Ava and Peggy Goo. They do come in their own coffins when you purchase them, but there’s also a warning that they will be searching for brains on Earth since they were denied entry into hell!

Mezco Toyz Living Dead Dolls Zombies Series 22 Menard by Mezco Toyz

Menard looks like he was a monk in his former life before he started to rot away as a zombie – and in doll form at that, who knew that monks could turn into zombie dolls!

If you think he looks creepy in this photo take it from me he looks a lot creepier in real life and yet there are people who love him.

Personally I felt a strong urge to make the sign of the cross when I came across him!

Mezco Toyz Living Dead Dolls Zombies Series 22 Ava by Living Dead Dolls

I haven’t seen Ava in real life, but she reminds me of an evil little girl from an old movie, the name of which escapes me right now.

I can almost feel the evil coming through this photograph I really don’t think Ava was a good little girl before she became a zombie – do you?

Maybe we should refer to Ava as the devil’s spawn or maybe she was killed as she was possessed, either way Ava is a very scary looking un-dead doll.

Mezco Toyz Living Dead Dolls Zombies Series 22 Goria by Living Dead Dolls

Goria is another one that I haven’t seen in real life, but I have to say I love the take on the Southern lady who’s been infected by zombies.

Knowing the detail in the other Living Dead dolls I can imagine that her piercing blue eyes would look even more dramatic when you were face to face with her.

This doll is probably the most ‘doll like’ of all of this range of dolls, in fact if you saw her lying face down you’d think she was an old porcelain doll that had been trashed by her owner, then you turn her over and the eyes will give you nightmares for weeks!

Mezco Toyz Living Dead Dolls Zombies Series 22 Roxie by Living Dead Dolls

When I first saw Roxie I didn’t realize that she was supposed to be a zombie, I thought she was a possessed girl and I swear a shiver ran through me – I could almost hear her scream in a foreign tongue.

Of course that wouldn’t happen because she’s not possessed she’s one of the un-dead, my imagination really did get away from me!

Living Dead Dolls Series 22 – Peggy Goo

Peggy Goo is another one that I haven’t seen in real life, but she’s basically a waitress on roller skates which just goes to prove that even skating can’t always keep you safe from zombies.

Although the idea of a skating zombie is interesting and I do like the idea of seeing one in a movie (there may already have been one, but I can’t remember seeing it), this doll is my least favorite out of this range. I just don’t feel very ‘freaked out’ by her!

Zombie Themed Halloween Decorations?

Some people have told me that they wouldn’t be able to sleep if any of these dolls were in their house (I don’t know how they’ll survive with actual zombies, but anyways…), others have told me that they’d make perfect Halloween decorations and I do think they would be great at that – don’t you?

Zombie Cinderella – A Fairy Tale for the Undead

Once Upon A Zombie….

I recently discovered a range of dolls called Once Upon a Zombie dolls and they are based on some of our favourite fairy princesses, but in zombie form. On the description for the dolls it says that a zombie curse was placed on them, but I’m not so sure that’s the full story.

There actually exists a parallel universe where in a world much like ours zombies roam around in most of the towns and cities. This world has storytellers just like our world does and they tell tales about names that are very similar to fairy tales from our world – Cinderella, Rapunzel, Snow White & Sleeping Beauty to name a few.

Let me share the undead version of the Cinderella story with you and I think when you see the description you’ll agree that the Once Upon a Zombie Cinderella doll was definitely based on this story.

(Just a side note, this story is different to the books sold in conjunction with these dolls).

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Zombie Cinderella – The Undead Tale

Ella Goes From Cinderella to Zombiella!Once upon a time a beautiful baby girl was born to a noble couple – she was the Honourable Lady Ella. Unfortunately the joy of her birth was overshadowed by the death of her mother days later. In spite of her motherless childhood Ellas was a very happy child with a good heart and when her father told her he had met someone she was excited to gain a new mother and two new sisters.

Not long after her father’s second marriage tragedy was to strike once again and Ella’s beloved father was killed in a riding accident. Ella’s stepmother was not happy when she discovered that her new husband didn’t leave her quite as well off as she would’ve liked and she would have to let the servants go. She turned her ire onto her stepdaughter and before long Ella was doing all of the cooking and housework – she was even tending the garden so that she could cook delicious meals with fresh vegetables and herbs.

Although her stepmother and sisters enjoyed Ella’s cooking they would never think of telling her she was good as they were to self absorbed.

One night after stoking the fire in the kitchen before meaning to head to bed Ella sat down on the heart and started to think about her father. In what seemed like only minutes later she heard a very indignant ‘Ella!’ and felt a sharp kick in her ribs. Opening her eyes she realized two things – one that she’d been asleep for a couple of hours and two that her younger stepsister was annoyed with her.

‘Ella, you’re supposed to leave me water on my bedside table, you know I get thirsty during the night.’ Ella scrambled up and started to apologise as she got a glass of water for her stepsister.

The next morning at breakfast Ella’s eldest stepsister complained that she really needed her own room and shouldn’t still be sharing with her sister. Before her mother could say anything her sister volunteered the information that Ella had been sleeping on the heart the night before.

Before the day was out Ella’s few remaining belongings were boxed up and put into the attic and her stepsisters each had their own bedrooms. Ella actually didn’t really mind sleeping by the fire after the first few nights as it was lovely and warm, but it didn’t take long before her family had renamed her Cinderella.

One day a letter was delivered to the house that requested all of the young ladies of the land attend a ball at the palace as the King’s only son was to find a bride. Ella’s stepsisters were very excited and talked nonstop about what kind of dresses they wanted to wear and how they should style their hair. Their mother listened and did some sums to see what they could afford to spend on dresses that she hoped would change their fortunes – you see Ella’s stepsisters may have been self-absorbed, selfish and mean girls, but they were both quite attractive and had a regal bearing about them.

As Ella’s stepmother and sisters plotted and planned Ella wondered when they’d turn to what she would be wearing so when they were all eating a delicious meal that night she tentatively asked, ‘so what do you think I should wear to the ball?’

For a second there was stunned silence until her sisters exploded in laughter – ‘Cinderella going to a ball?’

‘You’re too funny Cinder-ella – what would make you think you’re invited?’

‘The invitation said all of the ladies…..’ her stepmother interrupted Cinderella before she could finish talking ‘Ella, we simply don’t have enough money for four ballgowns and I will have to go to chaperone my daughters so you’ll have to stay here, besides you’ll be too busy to go out dancing.’

That night Cinderella didn’t sleep very well and was still feeling unhappy the next day. Even though she was a glorified slave to her step family she hadn’t felt unhappy until now, she really, really wanted to go to the ball. She carried on as normal for the next few days as the excitement over the ball reached fever pitch in the house until finally the day arrived.

All day her stepsisters (and stepmother – did no one tell her she was too old Cinderella thought uncharitably and then felt bad for having that thought!) were fussing with their hair and make-up until it was time to put on their gowns and leave. Her stepsisters looked stunning Cinderella thought, but just couldn’t bring herself to say that as she had been waiting all day for them to leave.

Cinderella raced up to the attic as soon as her family had left and pulled open one of her boxes to reveal a dress her mother had worn – it was the only thing she still had from her mother and she really hoped it would fit. She pulled the beautiful pink dress out and put it on – if fit beautifully, but moths had been at it and there were holes all over the material. Cinderella sat down and cried. Pulling off her dress she raced back down to the kitchen and sat on her hearth.

‘It’s not fair,’ she ranted at the flames, ‘I really wanted to go to the ball,’ and she burst into hot tears again.

‘If you really want to go to the ball then you shall,’ said a voice behind her. Stunned Cinderella spun around and stared at the lady who was standing in her kitchen with an ethereal light around her, ‘wh wh who are you?’ she stammered wondering if she was going a little mad.

‘I’m your fairy godmother Ella and you shall go to the ball. You have a good heart and this is the one thing you’ve asked for – I’m going to make it happen.’

‘But how, I’ve got nothing to wear and…..’ Cinderella shrugged her shoulders and sank back down onto the hearth in a defeated slump.

‘Ella, stand up,’ her fairy godmother commanded, ‘you’re a lady so stand up straight with your shoulders back and let me work my magic.’

Ella didn’t dare disobey and stood up straight really looking at her fairy godmother. ‘That’s better, now I think pink would be a nice color for you, don’t you agree?’

Ella nodded, not trusting herself to say anything.

‘Close your eyes Ella,’ her fairy godmother instructed and started to walk around her, ‘okay open your eyes now.’

Ella opened her eyes and looked down to see a beautiful ballgown she gasped and then ran up the stairs to look at herself in her stepmother’s full length mirror. ‘I look beautiful,’ she whispered to herself in awe. ‘You are beautiful Ella, inside and out,’ her fairy godmother said from the doorway. Ella turned this way and that to see how she looked, her blonde hair was in a gorgeous up/down do that framed her face and her dress was in two different shades of pink with blue (actually her favourite color) as an accent color.

‘Now Ella I need to tell you something very important so come back downstairs away from that mirror,’ her fairy godmother said and when they were in the kitchen she continued, ‘I have a horse drawn carriage outside waiting to take you to the ball and bring you home again, but there is only one condition. You must be home by midnight.’

‘Absolutely, of course, no problem,’ Ella breathed not wanting to wait another minute before leaving.

‘Ella, I mean it, if you’re not home by midnight there will be severe consequences,’

‘What consequences?’

‘You’ll turn into a zombie, and there’s no turning back from that. Midnight and not a second later – okay?’

‘I’ll make sure of it,’ Ella replied before impulsively leaning forward and planting a kiss on her fairy godmother’s pink cheek.

Excitement was making Ella’s stomach churn as she rode in her carriage on her way to the palace, she felt like she could hardly breathe – this was the biggest adventure she’d ever had. Little could she imagine how the evening would progress.

Ella entered the ball and saw hundreds of gorgeous girls in all of their finery – her step sisters were the other side of the ballroom and were busy preening themselves, talking loudly to make sure they were noticed. Ella accepted a drink and wandered around the upstairs corridor that would around the whole circumference of the ballroom enjoying watching everyone trying to outdo each other and smiling to herself. She was shocked when she heard a voice behind her – ‘Isn’t it fascinating watching them all trying to outdo each other?’

She turned and saw a young man who instantly made her heart skip a beat, Ella couldn’t speak, but that was okay because he continued, ‘would you do me the honor of accompanying me downstairs and dancing, I happen to know that my favourite song is going to be playing shortly.’

‘and exactly how do you know that?’

‘because any song that plays when I’m dancing with the most beautiful girl in the room will instantly become my favourite.’

‘oh, very smooth!’

‘so is that a yes?’

‘no, I’m sorry, I don’t really dance,’

‘That’s okay I’ll lead, there’s nothing to it,’ the handsome stranger sensed Ella’s hesitation before adding,’ please.’

‘Okay then, but if I tread on your toes you can’t complain,’ she laughed and the two of them headed down the main stairs and out onto the dancefloor.

Ella was hardly aware that the talking had stopped as everyone turned to stare at them, she was only aware of her dancing partner. She became aware of the whispering as the song was coming to an end and realized that she was dancing with the prince himself.

The prince commandeered her company all night and ignored all of the other women present, even her stepsisters (who didn’t even recognize her) couldn’t divert his attention away from her. It seemed like only a couple of hours had passed when the prince asked her to come and meet his parents and Ella looked at the big clock and realized it was five minutes to midnight.

She quickly pulled away from him apologising and saying that she had to go and then she ran outside, down the stairs losing a shoe in the process and practically fell into her carriage yelling at the driver to hurry. Just before her home came into view she heard a clock booming out the hour – midnight.

A sense of dread filled her and then everything went black.

Cinderella awoke to her stepmother and stepsisters coming into the kitchen talking nonstop about the mysterious woman who had commandeered the prince’s company all night. Thank goodness Ella thought, it was just a dream.

Her family were suddenly quiet and looked at her strangely, ‘Cinderella,’ her stepmother took a tentative step towards her, ‘are you okay?’

Ella tried to talk and realized that her words were all gabbled, she got up and when she walked towards her stepmother found that she was lurching. Then she saw the look of terror on their faces and realized that it wasn’t a dream after all – she was a zombie.

Her stepmother and stepsisters ran up the stairs – everyone always thinks that zombies are stupid and can’t go upstairs ….. they can, but Ella didn’t as she knew they’d have to come down for food.

Meanwhile the prince was trying to find out who his mystery lady was as they hadn’t exchanged names. A beautiful glass slipper had been found on the steps outside that Ella had lost in her haste and a plan began to form – he would send someone to every house in the land with the shoe to see who it fit – he was determined to find the princess of his heart.

It took a few days for the courtier to make it to Ella’s home and on that particular day the prince was accompanying him. Ella’s stepmother and her eldest stepsister had provided Ella with a nice feed of brains on the previous days but her youngest stepsister was still upstairs feeling rather faint with hunger when the doorbell rang.

Instead of calling out a warning to anyone she crept to the top of the stairs hoping that the diversion would help her to escape to safety. Ella walked towards the door as the courtier opened it and then stopped seeing her zombie state, the prince took one look and pushed his courtier aside.

Ella looked into his eyes and felt something light up inside, she was no longer filled with the need to feed there was something about this man that she recognized. ‘It’s you,’ the prince breathed, ‘my beautiful princess.’

Ella’s stepsister was on the last step of the staircase when she realized who was at the door, ‘ Oh no, this isn’t the lady from the ball your highness, it’s just my sister Cinderella.’

The prince looked at her and then clicked his finger at the courtier to get him to hand him the shoe, looking into Ella’s eyes the whole time he knelt down and slipped the glass slipper onto her foot. Ella’s stepsister gasped, amazed that it fit perfectly and then she noticed Ella’s dress (although it was now looking very tatty) and fell into a dead faint.

When she came to she was in a carriage on her way to the palace, the carriage in front was carrying the prince and Ella she was told by the courtier.

Obviously the prince couldn’t marry a zombie, but he kept Ella safe in the palace, visited her every day and fed her sheep and cow brains when she was hungry. Her stepsister who had helped christen Ella – Cinderella now referred to her as Zombiella and married the prince. She knew he would never love her the way he loved her stepsister, but she was a princess and that’s all she cared about.

Like This Fairy Tale?

If you enjoyed this fairy tale, then perhaps you’d like to buy the doll. If you were already thinking of buying the doll as a gift be sure to pass on the fairy tale to the lucky recipient as well.

Once Upon Zombie -I’m Zombie Cinderella

I must say I absolutely love her eyes – they are a gorgeous shade don’t you think? The doll is 11″ tall and I think it’s designed to be a real collectors item (but that could just be me!).

Also available in this collection are Zombie versions of Belle, Rapunzel, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White and the Little Mermaid …… maybe one day I’ll share their tales with you.

For now you can just admire the look of the dolls –

WowWee Once Upon A Zombie Sleeping Beauty Doll Once Upon A Zombie – I’m Zombie Rapunzel Once Upon A Zombie – I’m Zombie Belle Once Upon A Zombie – I’m Zombie Snow White Once Upon A Zombie – I’m Zombie Mermaid

Create a Zombie Cinderella Costume

If you love the idea of a Zombie Cinderella then why not dress up as her for Halloween, a Zombie Walk or some other fancy dress event? As a lot of people are unaware of the tale I’ve told above you’re probably best to base your Zombie Cinderella costume on the Disney version of Cinderella that we all grew up with.

Most people think of Cinderella wearing a gorgeous blue ballgown – I’m pretty sure it’s one of the reasons she was my favorite Disney princess when I was growing up as I loved the color blue!

The first step is to buy a Cinderella costume like this one featured below, next you just have to ‘zombify’ it otherwise known as trashing the costume to make it fit for a member of the undead!

Disney Cinderella Adult Deluxe Costume

Luckily you can pick up Cinderella costumes fairly economically these days so it’s doesn’t seem such a waste to destroy the dress, but let’s start with your make-up.

You’ll need to give your face a grey complexion – no rosy cheeks for an undead princess! You’ll also want to make sure your hair is a little askew. The Zombie Cinderella doll’s hair is a little bit too tidy to my mind!

Depending on the quality of the hem in the outfit you have you may be able to tear the dress a little with your hands to give it a raggedy, tatty look. Otherwise grab a pair of scissors and do what your mother always told you not to do – play with them!!

Roll around in the dress on grass or dirt – pretend you’re a kid again and roll down a hill – it’s great fun and you’re ‘working’ on your costume. Spray or splatter some fake blood on the dress and voila! you have a cool zombie Cinderella costume.

HOLD THE PRESSES!

You can now buy a Once Upon a Zombie costumes! Now I haven’t been able to find an adult Zombie Cinderella at the moment, but I have found a tween’s one so that you can see what they look like –

Once Upon a Zombie Cinderella Child/tween Costume (X-Large)

Are Zombie Gnome Lawn Ornaments Safe?

Zombie Gnomes - a garden decoration or are they out to get you? — Click to see a selection of zombie gnomes

Some people see the range of Zombie Gnome Lawn Ornaments available these days and think ‘oh how cute!’ or ‘what a great gift idea.’ Do they not realize that some of us already know that zombie gnomes are after us.

They really need to heed the warning to – watch out for the Zombie Gnomalypse!

I’m sure you’ve heard tales of when gnomes attack and that you’ve noticed them lurking in gardens waiting for their moment to take over the world, but what about when they’re zombified?

Zombie gnomes are terrifying as they don’t even try to look like innocent little garden statues that mean you no harm – instead they look like zombies on a small scale.

A word of warning however, just because they’re small doesn’t mean they’re any less dangerous than actual zombies! These zombie gnomes have an advantage over ‘ordinary’ zombies in that they aren’t usually seen shuffling along after their prey. These sneaky creatures stay perfectly still so that people stop and admire them or even buy them as a novelty for their garden or as gifts for friends.

Once you’re asleep, the zombie gnomes are able to take you by surprise and you never wake up again…………. would you like to get one of these gnomes and see if the outcome would be any different should you take one home?

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Not Scared of a Zombie Gnome?

What About Two of Them?

I’m not sure I’d trust a solitary zombie gnome in my garden, but I’m positive that I wouldn’t trust two of them together! While you and I may not be able to hear them it doesn’t mean that gnomes can’t communicate with one another – it’s like a form of telepathy I’ve been told.

Imagine this set of two – it would be a lot easier for the two of them to plot your downfall than one on it’s own wouldn’t it? Having said that this could be the perfect gift for an annoying mother-in-law or a sibling that’s always lorded it over you, the office gossip who you just know started that rumor about you last year……..

Zombie Boy & Girl Gnome Set – Halloween & Outdoor Decor

This set of two zombie gnomes are really cute and perfect for placing outside. They’re considered child friendly as their obscure facial expressions don’t scare children (although we know better don’t we?)

Zombies are pretty ‘hot’ these days just think of the success of ‘The Walking Dead’ as a television series so giving someone a gift like this would be seen as a novelty.

You couldn’t possibly be held responsible if anything should happen to your ‘friend’ or family member – could you?

Are Zombie Gnome Lawn Ornaments REALLY Dangerous?

Now some people still aren’t convinced that gnomes ever attack which is why they’re completely oblivious to the dangers of this new breed of zombie gnomes. I’d like to find out exactly how well these creatures are flying under the radar and to help me I need people to take this quick poll.

If You Really, Really Want a Zombie Gnome – Buy One Here!

Single Zombie Gnomes Aren’t Quite as Dangerous as Pairs!

Here are a few zombie gnomes for you to choose from if you really feel like you simply have to have one. Please don’t have several as the more you have the easier it will be for them to penetrate any defenses you set up to keep yourself and your family safe.

These gnomes may not be able to reach the door handle to get into your home on their own, but standing on each other’s shoulders …….. well it makes you think doesn’t it?

I must admit these would certainly make a cool decoration for Halloween ….. I’m certainly considering it, although I’d have to make sure I locked them all in the basement at night in the lead up to All Hallows Eve and then once the ‘night of fright’ is over with I would have to make sure they were all destroyed – hmmmm.

Forum Novelties Halloween Horror Zombie Garden Gnome

This one looks the part, but isn’t made of resin. It seems to be made of a light plastic which does cut down on the risk to your health.

It also probably wouldn’t be that good as a gift for someone who might actually like gnomes, for someone who likes zombies however it could be a bit of fun!

Thumbs Up! Zombie Garden Gnome

Made from terracotta and painted with weather resistant paint this is a bone fide zombie gnome that you could easily gift to someone as a novelty gnome.

Alternatively if you’re really that blase about the dangers you could keep it for yourself!

Zombie Gnome Girl Garden Statue Sculpture Halloween Decor

This resin gnome is supposed to be a zombie girl, but I had to include it because it reminded me of Smurfette!

I’m sure this is Smurfette in a Halloween costume dressed up as a zombie gnome – what do you think?

Want to use Zombie Gnome Ornaments as Halloween Decor?

A Cool Outdoor Decoration to Get Your Neighbors Talking

Zombie Gnome Bits Scary Halloween Party Garden Decor

If you just like the idea of using these zombie gnomes as Halloween decor then this zombie gnome garden set of 3 zombie ‘bits’ is an ideal solution.

A couple of heads and a hand will have people wondering what’s happening in your garden and it might even keep you safe from any zombie gnomes in your neighborhood as they may think you’ve decapitated some of their colleagues and everyone knows that zombie gnomes are basically cowards. They attack when you’re asleep or have your back to them and if they think you’re onto them then the chances are they’ll give your house a wide berth!

I hope you’ve enjoyed our post on zombie gnomes, please feel free to share any of your experiences with these sneaky, brains obsessed garden ornaments……..

Help a Friend Survive the Zombie Apocalypse

Survive the Zombie Apocalypse with these how to survive the Zombie Apocalypse books and survival kits. — Zombie Survival Kit

Survival Guides and kits make great gifts for friends who you want to be with after the Zombies try to take over!

There’s nothing quite like being prepared for a disaster, but unfortunately we all have friends or family members who just aren’t. Why not give them the gift of preparedness with either a survival kit or a guide so that they can learn how to get on in a post apocalyptic world, more specifically a zombiefied post apocalyptic world.

I’ve compiled a few gift selections that may help them, of course it wouldn’t hurt to grab a couple of these for yourself because you can never be too prepared!

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The Zombie Combat Manual: A Guide to Fighting the Living Dead

Written by a former US Army Ranger, Roger Ma the Zombie Combat Manual is a thoroughly comprehensive guide to becoming an effective Zombie combat warrior.

It’s a funny, yet useful read and I think the words of Allie Townsend from Techland.com sums it up well in her blurb about this book when she says –

“It’s a guide for unskilled, inexperienced and slightly out of shape humans threatened by the return of the dead and cites basic combat skills and ordinary household objects as the primary weapons of your defense. Basically, when it comes to the Zombie Apocalypse, this book may be biblical.”

The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead

Max Brooks book is also very good at laying out exactly how to survive including his Top Ten Lessons for Surviving a Zombie Attack.

If you don’t get the book above by Roger Ma then this one is the next best thing, in fact some prefer this book to the other……you could just get both to be on the safe side!

Zombie Defense Solutions 3 Day Survival Kit, Brown

This kit includes everything you need to survive for 72 hours while you’re regrouping and planning your next moves. It includes a first aid kit, space age blanket, food, water, matches etc.

This should be in every household and every dorm room in the country in case of any emergency, Zombie or otherwise.

AMC’s The Walking Dead Survival Kit – Two Person

This officially licensed survival kit is a must have for any Walking Dead fans. Unlike the kit above it claims to be a premium disaster preparedness kit for two, very good gift idea for a couple.

This means that two of you could survive for the first 72 hours with the supplies here, or alternatively one of you could survive for 6 days (I’m just putting it out there!).

Housed in a durable (and cool looking, if you want to go for post-apocalypse chic) military style bag the kit includes a first aid kit, food and water rations, flashlight, glow sticks and 2 space blankets.

How to Defeat a Zombie

A Zombie Hunter’s Weapons of Choice

Technically you can’t kill a zombie as they aren’t actually alive. You can stop them from lurching towards you and attempting to feast on you however.

As blood no longer pumps through their body aiming for their heart is pointless instead you need to go for their head. From a gun to a baseball bat there are lots of weapons you can use to destroy a zombie. Even a stake, more commonly associated with vampires can work really well on a zombie.

Let’s have a look at a few ideas so that you can choose your zombie hunter weapon of choice.

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The Baseball Bat

A Classic Zombie Hunter Weapon of Choice

A baseball bat is quite a classic weapon when it comes to taking down zombies, but it’s not the most effective one so why is it one of the first things that springs to people’s minds? The availability of course! Most homes seem to have a baseball bat in them which is why if you’re caught unawares and find you’re suddenly in the middle of a Zombie Apocalypse you can usually grab a baseball bat until you can get hold of another weapon.

One on one a baseball bat is quite good to use – swing it at the head to destroy the zombie or if you’re a little squeamish about doing that then hitting them in the knees or the spine can send them to the ground in order for you to run away. After you’ve come across a few I predict you’ll get over feeling squeamish about destroying them!

The problem with a baseball bat is that if you come across a crowd of zombies they’ll be able to overcome you before you can take them all out.

A good secondary or emergency weapon, but look for something better for your primary weapon of choice.

A Cricket Bat

Of course if you live outside of the US then baseball is no longer a national sport. In a number of places cricket is very popular and the pros and cons of using a cricket bat is pretty much the same as using a baseball bat.

I had to include it, however, because they use it in one of my favorite zombie movies – Shaun of the Dead. I should probably add that I loved this movie more for the sense of humor than the zombie action

The Crossbow

Daryl’s Weapon of Choice on The Walking Dead

The crossbow is a great choice as a defensive weapon against zombies and not just because Daryl makes it look good either! Unlike a bow and arrow which takes a lot of training to master you can teach someone to be proficient with a crossbow in very little time.

The drawback with a crossbow is that you do need to have strength to pull the string back, it’s really not as easy as it’s portrayed on movie and television screens. There is also a time lag for reloading an arrow every time which means it’s not the best if you find yourself surrounded by zombies.

The biggest advantage with the crossbow, however is that it is quiet which means you can easily pick off a zombie on it’s own without attracting hoards of other undead to the area. Another advantage is that you can reuse the arrows which is very handy as there’s nothing worse than running out of ammo for your weapon.

If you’re a Walking Dead fan then you might be interested to know that according to Norman Reedus the crossbow he uses on the show is a Stryker Strykezone. Originally in the first couple of seasons they were using a different crossbow that wasn’t as easy to use.
This is a real weapon so don’t get if you just want to dress up like Daryl for a fancy dress event, if however you want to go hunting for squirrels or want to be prepared for a zombie uprising then this is something you should think about getting.

A Gun

A Noisy, But Effective Weapon of Choice

A gun is certainly a weapon that will destroy a zombie, but there are drawbacks to using one. The first (and very important) drawback is the noise, zombies will hear a gunshot and will descend on the location quicker than Aunt Martha can make it to the dessert bar!

Unlike arrows bullets can’t be reused which means that you have to constantly find more ammo for your gun. Also, unlike how it seems on the television or at the movies you can’t just pick up a gun and successfully aim, fire and destroy your target! If you’re thinking of relying on a gun then get yourself some target practice in now before the undead ‘rise’.

There are lots of different types of guns available and the advantages to them if you have a good ammo supply is that you can shoot from a distance (the distance depending on the type of gun) and if you have a good aim you can take out a larger number fairly quickly (again it depends on your individual gun so ask the appropriate questions when getting one).

How To Kill Zombies T-Shirts

Is Your Favorite Zombie Weapon Featured?

Let’s take a moment to enjoy these t-shirts before we go back to looking at our weapons of choice for destroying the undead – I like the old school t-shirt, although as I’ve mentioned probably not the best methods in reality!

Gunshots Attract Zombies T-Shirt Old School Zombie Killer Hunter T-Shirt Zombie Red II T-Shirt

The Axe & The Bow

Kicking Zombies Old School Style!

Because of two of the t-shirts I’ve featured above I thought I had better make a quick note about the merits and problems with using an axe or a bow to try and defeat a zombie.

Most of the problems with using an axe are the same as using a baseball bat or cricket bat – one on one is okay, but in a crowd you’re not going to get out of there alive! The axe also has another problem in that sometimes it will get stuck in a zombie’s head before it’s done it’s job – if you thought getting it stuck in a block of wood was frustrating imagine how you’d feel if the same thing happened when you were fighting to stay alive!

The bow actually takes a lot more skill and strength then people realize, it’s not easy for just about anyone to pick it up and find they can aim and hit their target to start with let alone with enough strength to penetrate their skull. Just because they’re undead doesn’t make their skulls go soft, you need to send your arrow with a lot of force behind it. A crossbow is a much better option unless you’re Geena Davis in which case a bow would be great – reuasable ammo, quiet weapon…..perfect in fact!

The Knife & The Sword

Stabbing and Decapitating the Undead

I’ve included the knife and sword together here as we’re talking about blades, but the difference between a small dagger and a katana style sword like Michonne’s in The Walking Dead are totally different.

A knife such as a dagger or hunting knife has a disadvantage in the fact that you have to be in really close range to use it and that means that if your knife gets stuck in the skull then you’re in really big trouble. You need to have enough force behind the knife to let if penetrate the skull in the first place and it’s really not hard to imagine the knife getting stuck in there is it?

When it comes to a longer sword like a katana it raises the odds because you’re a little further away from the zombie with a longer blade, but swinging that blade around and taking out half a dozen zombies without breaking a sweat may work for Micchone on the Walking Dead, but in reality could it be a good weapon?

Apparently according to experts it could be really good and could easily decapitate a zombie, but and here’s that little three lettered word again! You need to know how to use it as it takes skill and a lot of training to be able to wield it effectively AND you need to be fit, it takes a lot of fitness and core body strength to keep swinging the sword.

The Stake

Not Just For Killing Off Vampires!

As I mentioned the stake in the introduction I thought I had better add mention of it here. Obviously it’s going to be hard to pierce a skull with a stake, but if you have a lot of upper body strength you could try and poke the stake through one of their eyes in an upward motion and it could be lights out. The handy thing is that you can fashion a stake out of a picket fence or a railing so they’re pretty easy to come by. Not an ideal primary weapon, but because of availability I would definitely add stakes to my back up artillery………..it would also be handy if you came across any vampires as well, although that would be a really bad day to contemplate!

Zombie Dart Boards

While darts won’t help you to take down a zombie, if you’re good at darts it will help your hand eye co-ordination so that should you find yourself with a crossbow or some such weapon that can help to destroy a zombie you’ll be able to aim it properly!

Whether or not you view darts as zombie hunter training or just a cool pub game to enjoy with friends you can’t help but love these zombie inspired dart boards. These are sure to become conversation pieces in your games room – they are certainly much more of a statement piece than my existing standard darts board!

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I’ve always thought of darts as being an English pub game, but according to some dart historians (yes there is such a thing!) the game may have originated in France, in the Jura region to be exact. There are actually two different forms of darts played one of which is called Javelot and the other is called Flechettes.

Javelot is played with foot-long darts that are thrown underarm, now as a zombie has no blood this wouldn’t help you with destroying them, but in a Zombie Apocalypse it could help you to kill small prey in order to eat – just saying…..

Flechettes Is the form that’s most similar to the darts we’re familiar with which won’t help by themselves, but does encourage that eye hand co-ordination that I’ve already spoken about.

Cool Zombie Themed Dart Boards

Let’s have a look at some of the cool zombie inspired designs that are available for you to choose from……..

Zombies Hate Fast Food Dart Board Keep Calm and Carry On Zombies Dart Board Smiling Zombie Girls Dart Board

Is it a fun game piece, an interesting conversation piece or a training device? Which of these would you call a zombie dart board? I think the answer would have to be all three, but it’s up to you to make up your own mind and decide whether or not your home should be without one of these cool dart boards.

Eye Heart Zombies Dartboard Zombie Apocolypse Art Dartboards zombies were people too dartboards

Did you know that although darts is often thought of as a game for the working classes who played it in pubs and inns it also has royal connections that go back hundreds of years? Apparently Henry VIII himself enjoyed playing in fact Anne Boleyn gave him a set of darts in 1530 before they were married …………………. I bet he didn’t have a board as cool as these zombie ones though.

What Do You Think of Zombie Dart Boards?

Do you think you’ll get a zombie dart board? The do also make a great gift idea and I’m thinking of getting one for my (also zombie obsessed) brother.